come to my window...

yup. you got it. saturday afternoon, stuck at the office. peace, quiet and unfortunately a headache. which has kept me from staring at the screen and from reading till half-way past the shift. what can one do as an alternative? yup. think. and that's just as bad an idea as ever.

i opened the window wide. i can't sit by they window. well, i could, but i couldn't see outside, as the windows are rather high set, the sill is pretty wide and about the height of my chest. so i stood by it. my jacket was there, on the central heating because it needed to dry. it rained so hard as i was coming to work, that the rain actually soaked through in places, my t-shirt was wet on my back. not to mention that my jeans were soaked up to my knees because some idiot considered it perfectly ok to speed through puddles in a weather like this. anyways, i'm digressing. but then again, that's normal for me.

as said, i opened the window. i cuddled into the spread jacket, which was nice and warm from the heating. and there was fresh, crips air on my face. it's still raining outside, though not so heavily. barely past seven in the evening and pitchdark, a black darkness (yes, darkness can be otherwise too... dark blue, for instance) filled with little yellow lights in the distance. and a few disturbingly coloured ones, from commercials. but mainly yellow-orange ones. and some nearer, from the street lighting below (did i mention my office is at the fourth floor?). i have always loved the way streetlights reflect in the wet asphalt at night. it creates a special atmosphere. i like that.

so i stood by the window for nearly half an hour, my belly and arms nice and warm from the central heating and the jacket, my back cool from the fresh air streaming inside. and my forehead cooled by the night air (is 7 pm air night air?). that did my headache well. i've shut the window now, as the office was getting too cold and the headache is coming back too. i think i'm going back.

if i think some more, i might even write something. because such demons as awake in times like these can't be defeated. you either surrended and succomb, or let them out in the world in some non-destructive way. that, for me, is writing. i don't have many who care about them, not anyone who could even begin to understand them, and none on whom i'd dare to set them lose. so i let them go into the night... you can sometimes catch a glimpse of them, at nights, if you pass by my window...

for musical illustration click here.

second picture by ahmet kasim.